???
"Walk with me."
The two follow Ingram across the plaza towards the shopping district. It's well lit and colourful, built with a lot of glass and painted metal, and littered with banners and posters boasting all sorts of products, services, and craftspeople. Most of the buildings reach high above the ground streets, connecting on their upper floors by a network of walkways and mid-air tunnels. The lowest floors mostly sell heavier goods like furniture or large electronics; the group quickly ascends past them and onto the mid levels. Here there is the greatest variety of stores: plants, clothes, artwork, craft supplies, and many food and drink stalls taking advantage of the heavier foot-traffic.
???
"So, where should we start, what kind of clothes do you usually like to wear? Ingram asks a vacant Sig, who seems to be distracted by a film shop across the street.
"Sig." Ulysses pinches it gently on the arm.
"Ah! Yes, um, mostly skirts I think." Its head is turned but its eyes still wander.
"Hah, hm. That's not much to work with." Ingram ponders for a moment. "Do you have a favourite colour?"
"Yellow."
"Great, we'll start with that."

???
Ulysses finished changing before Sig, so she waits in the showers. It's been too long since she was last here, she looks around the room; a dimly lit corridoor between the changing rooms and pool. Pipes and showerheads jut out of the rough rock walls and spill warm water into a lowered floor, pooling just above her toes.
As the flow pours over her, she feels it trickle down her exposed skin and becomes a little more aware of her body than she would like. Her swimsuit is comprised of a plain black 1 piece suit worn under dark red shorts that must be a size too big for her. Despite the coverage, she feels uncomfortably revealed. At the time when she swam here regularly she had been keeping herself shaved, but she stopped all that a long time ago, and now her wirey frame is sparsely covered in thin patchy hair. Her limbs feel thin and underdeveloped, she can't tell if she's lost weight or just confidence, or both.
Her thoughts are interrupted when Sig enters her field of view. The boy is wearing a sporty one piece - a cute costume with very short legs and no sleeves, with a big cutout showing off the boy's back, all in shade of dull yellow with short soft frills around some of the edges. It's much nicer than Ulysses' swimsuit, and compliments its already pretty body a lot better too. Despite its looks Sig stands awkwardly, holding itself as if totally unaware of its own looks. She glances away with a bitter twinge of envy.
After they leave the showers, Sig is the first to enter the pool. It sits on the edge with its feet in the water before using its one full arm to lower itself in. Dipping its head under the surface and coiling its legs back, it then thrusts forward gracefully, paddling on its front for a short while before flipping over onto its back, where it continues to glide across the surface. Reluctantly, Ulysses slides herself in behind it. She places her goggles on her face, dunks her head under the water, and pushes herself forward into a breaststroke behind the boy.
As she coasts through the surface of the pool, a tranquility passes over Ulysses. Something about swimming always brings this out; the outside world and all its stresses seems to be washed off the moment she steps into the water, every thrust forward only taking her further away. Leaning forward, she dives below the surface and even further away from the world. Everything she sees is a murky blue lit by the shimmer of light dancing across the surface, all sound is drowned out into a low muffle, even gravity cannot reach her while she's sumberged, the bouyancy keeping her hanging effortlessly above the ground.
For a few lengths of the pool, the pair wordlessly swim side by side, basking in the tranquility. After a while of this, Sig stops by the deep end, and stays hanging onto the side. It looks happy, but maybe a little tired. Ulysses lifts her goggles up approaches it, treading water.
"Do you want to rest for a bit?" Ulysses asks.
"Maybe, yeah. It's been ages since I last did this."
"How's the costume?"
"It's good!" Sig beams at her. "It's really pretty, and it's comfortable." It pushes off the wall for a moment to do a little spin, looking down to watch the frills fan out as it turns.
Sig is right, the costume does look very pretty on it. Looking over its soft curves and perfect proportions, Ulysses feels that unwelcome jolt of self-consciousness run through her chest again.
"I think I'm going to do some lengths now." She mutters, sounding more gloomy than she'd intended to come across.
Feeling too awkward to attempt to clarify herself, she quickly turns and kicks off the wall, jetting through the water in a front crawl. She finds her pace and begins to pick up speed. Again, each thrust forward seems to take her further away from the real world, each length takes her further away from her own awkwardness and stress - that seem to follow her every waking moment but here. Ulysses pace slows, suddenly and sooner than it should. She must be more out of shape than she'd thought.
It seems as though she can swim away from everything except her body. Now each thrust forward is a reminder of her weakness, each breath she takes seems to come a moment sooner than she should need to breathe. Ulysses swims harder to keep pace, throwing all her strength her wirey arms can muster into each thrust, moving her legs in a flurry of kicks that quickly lose any rhythm. She has to breathe more to keep up, which means she has to swim harder to keep bringing her head above the water, which only exhausts her more and more until her front crawl deteriorates, dragging herself to the end of the pool in a flailing paddle.
She pulls up next to Sig, who seems to have been watching her for a while.
"Wow, you're way faster than me when you're really trying."
"You think so? I was terrible by the end there."
"But just before that you were going very quick, you were doing that for a while. It's much faster than anything I can do."
"I feel like I have an unfair advantage there."
"You're really good though, how long have you been swimming?"
"Since I was a kid I guess? I think everyone from the platforms gets taught when they're very young."
"That makes sense, with all the water."
"Yeah." Ulysses shrugs.
"I used to go when I was a young teenager, but that was a long time ago. I haven't been in years."
"How come?" Ulysses asks, "what made you stop I mean?"
"I don't really know." Sig gets a bit quieter, "I think I just got busy for a while, too focused on school for anything else. Then by the time I was free again I'd started, you know, turning." It tilts its head and looks downwards as if to gesture at its body. "Didn't really want anybody to see any of this."
"Yeah, I know what you mean."
There is a moment of silence as neither of them know what to say next. Then Ulysses decides to change the topic back to what it was before.
"You're still good at swimming though, even if it's been that long, especially given your - you know, uh."
Sig looks a little confused.
"Sorry," Ulysses says, "I'm not sure how to talk about that without sounding really patronising. Ignore me."
"It's okay, I know what you mean."
"I mean, for someone who hasn't swam in years, you're doing pretty good."
Sig gives Ulysses a small smile, and she kicks off the back wall, swimming with her head under the surface again so she can't embarrass herself any further.
The pair swim some more, Sig continuing with its backstroke and Ulysses eventually returning from her front crawl to her slower but more manageable breaststroke. Most of the awkwardness fades away and they chat a little between lengths, and before long almost an hour has passed.
After climbing out of the water, the pair rinse off the chlorine under the showers, grab their belongings, and look for a changing room. Ulysses goes through two entire row of locked changing rooms, and halfway down another before finding a single empty cubicle. She'd been trying to avoid peak times, they must have been in the pool longer than she'd expected to be.
"You take this one," she says, "I'll look around some more and see if any others get free, I don't mind waiting."
Sig walks in but doesn't close the door. It pokes its head back out, looking up and down the row at all the locked doors, and then forward at Ulysses, who's trying to look like she isn't shivering.
"Are you sure?" Sig asks her, "I don't mind if you change in here with me?"
Ulysses sighs and then reluctantly pokes her head inside. She needs her privacy, and this cubicle is rather cramped for two people, but maybe it'd be fine if they just turned their backs to each other. It's preferable to shivering outside while she waits for someone else to finish, she supposes. Stepping inside, she locks the door behind her and dumps her bag on the narrow bench - Sig has already started changing.
Gingerly, she peels her top off of her chest before wringing the bulk of the water out. As shes steps back to give her legs room to take off her shorts, she instincitively checks over her shoulder to make sure she doesn't bump into Sig, immediately turning her head back when she sees the rear of its entirely exposed body. Of course it's naked, they're both getting changed, what did she possibly think she'd accomplish by looking over? Now acutely aware of her own half-nudity, she rummages through her bag and slips on a shirt to give her a sense of modesty before she goes back to the shorts. It's strange to think how long it's been since she last naked around another Pseudo, strange to think she almost broke that streak without even realising.
Just after she wrings out her shorts and puts her normal pants back on, Sig asks her a question.
"Ulysses, I'm having some trouble, can you help me put this on?" When she turns to reply she's faced with a half naked boy, holding out a bra in its one hand. This isn't the first time she's seen its breasts but the last time was so brief, she hadn't really had a good look. They're each small handfuls, but still a lot larger than Ulysses', and more developed too, with large dark brown buds that have shrivelled a little in the cold. It's a pretty chest, especially as it is now, framed by soft wet curls of gray hair and glistening slightly from the moisture.
"I'm supposed to take one without hooks when I go swimming," it slightly waves its handless arm to make a point, "but it's been so long, I guess I forgot."
"Oh, sure, let me help you," She says awkwardly, hopeful that she wasn't staring for as long as she thought. Sig pulls the bra over its shoulders and turns its back to Ulysses. She takes the straps into her hands, and firmly closes them together, feeling a slight buzz in her nerves as her fingers brush against its cool skin, pressing into the flesh of its scarred back slightly as it hooks the sides together. "Done."
"Thank you!" It says sweetly, untucking its damp curly gray hair from under the straps on its shoulders. Sig seems so innocent, almost naive - like it's unaware of just how pretty it is. It's kind of cute. Ulysses remains facing the wall away from it, until they're both fully clothed and ready to leave.

A mixture of fatigue, painkillers, and hormones; the fever feels like its cooking her mind, each idea bleeds messily into the next and she can barely hold a thought for more than a few seconds before it melts into incoherence.
???
She hasn't been this bad in years, since before she and Ingram split. He used to be good at taking care of her when she was ill, but she got used to helping herself once he was gone. After a while the loneliness stops being a yearning, bleeding absence, and starts becoming a static fact of life, eventually she found security in its stability. She thought Sig might break that security, rob her of her privacy and freedom, but she feels okay, or safe? Does she feel safe around it? Maybe not safe, definitely not safe like Ingram used to be, but there's something, some need.
Her head throbs, her body is burning up. She can't tell what she feels about this boy. Or rather she knows exactly what she feels but won't let herself admit it. She can't admit it. If she acknowledged her feelings it would ruin everything. Sig is accommadating and nice to her because it has to be, it's a guest in Ulysses' house, even if it hated her it'd probably still act polite, pretend to humor her. If she asked to fuck it would it just say yes to please her? Out of fear?
Ulysses' train of thought derails. If she asked it what? Is that it? Is that really what all this is about? Entertaining the thought even for a moment disgusts her - its soft body against hers, lips pressing into lips, her hands bracing its sides. Gross. Or well, the idea of her using Sig like this is gross. Sig isn't gross at all, that's where the problem came from. She didn't think much of it at first, but as the two have gotten closer she can't stop herself from looking at it. Its cute face and kind eyes, the way its curly silver hair spills around its stubby horns, the slender curves of its body. Ulysses thinks she could kill for proportions like that - tall and slender, with a little soft fat around its legs and belly, small soft breasts that are much better developed than her own. It doesn't care about hiding its body as much as Ulysses does, she's seen them a couple of times now, she wonder how they'd feel in her hands.
A firm heat is building between her legs, more overpowering than the heat of this fever. The longer her mind dwells on the boy the worse it gets. It won't do any harm just to think, not unless Sig was close enough to feel her hum, but its not. If anything she needs to do this, to get it out of her system before she risks it finding out. Surely if Sig were next to her while she had these thoughts, the psychic bleed would be strong enough that even a red blooded operator could hear her desire screaming out. What if it touched her while she had these thoughts? It would know in an instant. What if that was okay though, what if the boy felt her need for its body and that was okay? If it wanted her back, if without a word it gave itself to her, desperate for her to take it, to use it for her self.
She imagines how Sig might look below her, how its face would twist between pain and bliss. She didn't notice when her hand slipped underneath her waistband, but it's here now, it's been here for a while. Ulysses knows she's stronger than the boy, it would be the easiest thing in the world to pin it to the bed and chew on its neck while she buried herself between his legs. Her thoughts stop moving and linger on that for a while - how it would feel pumping herself into it, the desparate moans as she marked up its neck leaving bruises that last days, proving it belongs to her.
The heat explodes into a rush that surges convulsions throughout her entire body; her hips bucking, breath panting, toes curled so tight it hurts. It reverberates for a while before gradually fading into a peacefull bliss. Her hand is soaked and her mind is full to the brim with shame.

???
Sig tilts its head and rests it onto Ulysses shoulder. Without really thinking she reaches her arm around its side and pulls it in slightly closer. It isn't that weird, it's not like this is the first time they've cuddled. The room is cold and Sig is warm, and its the one who leant in first, it's not like she's taking advantage, right?
An arm reaches around her chest, Sig has turned its body into Ulysses', nuzzling its head into her neck. With its hand resting on her bare arm, she can sense its hum quite clearly; a warm, safe buzz. Maybe there's something else in there, or maybe that's just wishful thinking. Its horns are pressed against her neck, she dreads to wonder what her hum is giving away.
Ulysses tries to focus on the show. The next few minutes feel normal, and she begins to forget about her feelings.
???
Sig nuzzles its head into her again and she wraps her arms around tighter, squeezing the side of its chest under its arm. A gentle, almost imperceptible moan escapes its lips as it shifts its body again, intertwining its legs with hers. By now its head has slipped down onto Ulysses' chest, and she can feel its hot breath through her thin shirt. She leans her head over on top of its own and hugs Sig closer again, her hand rests on a patch of exposed torso where its shirt has ridden up, and she squeezes its bare skin gently. With its one arm it squeezes her back. Her heart is pounding.
She can barely see the screen anymore but she does not care. She only wants to look at Sig. It's not wrong to look, right? There's no harm in admiring it, admiring those messy curls of bleached-gray hair, those cute stumpy horns, the gentle curves of its body. Its dark skin feels impossibly soft - its whole body feels soft. She can feels its breasts squished against her arm, and she feels a twinge of embarrasment realising she's been entirely physically aroused for some time now, and Sig's leg is positioned dangerously close between her thighs.
She looks away from it, ashamed of how worked up she's been getting. Sig barely trusts anybody but it trusts her enough to share such a vulnerable space with her, and she just wants to take advantage. The embarrasment turns to guilt and she loosens her hold on Sig, but as she slowly starts to pull away it grasps her arm and opens its mouth.
"Ulysses, are you still watching?" It's voice sounds flustered, maybe? Or slightly afraid. She'd almost completely forgot about the show, it must have ended a moment ago because the credits are playing now.
"No." She responds. There is a moment of pause, when she turns back to see its face, Sig is flushed red, and cannot take its eyes off of her lips. Its hum is loud, and clear. Asking, no, begging for one thing.
"Do you want to ki-" Ulysses does not wait even a second. Any sense of reason has disappeared from her mind. The last 2 months of aching tension boil over in an instant and she cannot control her body anymore. She presses her lips firmly onto Sig's in a deep kiss.
???
Sig lifts its butt for a moment as Ulysses pulls its underwear off, stretching out thin strands of clear fluid between the wet patches on its pants and crotch. It has a very faint smell that makes her feel slightly dizzy just thinking about it.
With the underwear all the way off, Ulysses looks again at its now fully exposed body, her gaze fixing between its legs. She's a little confused.
"It's soft?"
"Yes." It replies, sheepishly. "It's been like that for a couple of years now."
She guesses hormones must have affected its body a little differently to hers. It's cute. A bit shriveled, surrounded by a short patch of thin fuzz, and glistening in a puddle of arousal. Even soft hers would still be noticably bigger than this.

When Ulysses wakes the sun has only just began to rise. For a brief while she tries to fall back asleep, but her body won't let her. Dim orange light seeps around her curtains and onto her bed. She groggily sits up and rubs her eyes. As she pulls herself out of the bedsheets a chill washes over her body and she realises that she had fallen asleep entirely unclothed. This is unusual, she used to sleep like this quite often, but not in a long time, certainly not since last summer. Nakedness had begun to feel deeply exposed to her, making it impossible to ignore her body and all its flaws. She runs a hand over her bony ribcage and down over her unshaven torso, it doesn't make her happy.
It is only as she pulls the duvet away to get up that she realises she has been sharing this bed. Sig stirs in its sleep, grasping weakly at the blankets and mumbling softly for a moment before drifting back off. It lays on its side, all covered up besides its arm and pretty face. A messy pile of white curly hair tumbles over its cheeks. She knows its a fair few years older than her, but Ulysses can't help but think Sig looks childlike here - vulnerable and innocent, trusting her so deeply and naively as to sleep by her side. She's terrified of hurting the boy, it would be the easiest thing in the world. But perhaps she already did; the memories of last night flood into her like dirty water. She knows she should not have done that, she knew it was wrong the whole time she was doing it, and yet she did it anyway.
Disgusted with herself, Ulysses begins to rise but stops when she hears another moan and movement from the other side of the bed. Bleary-eyed, Sig reaches out its hand towards her leg and mumbles something she can't make out. She stops and it pouts, still grasping at her. It looks upset, or disappointed? Or wounded? They look into each other's eyes and she feels guilty again. After all she's taken it would be cruel to leave it here, neglected and vulnerable. No matter how she feels, the boy clearly does not want her to go yet. Hesitantly she sits herself back onto the bed, allowing Sig to touch her. It wraps its arm across her chest and grabs her side, pulling her in close enough to nuzzle its head into her shoulder. She feels the warmth of its soft body and turns into the hug, placing her hand onto the boy's arm and stroking gently with her thumb. It purrs softly, then places a delicate kiss on her cheek.

???
"Sig?"
"Hi?"
"I feel bad," she can't look it in the eye, "about the other night. I shouldn't have."
"Shouldn't have what?"
"You know, in bed. That was selfish of me."
"I don't think it was," Sig blushes a little,"I enjoyed it, a lot."
There's a feeling of pressure in the air. The hum from Sig's head is louder than she's used to. It feels spikey and uncontained. It's anxious but she can't tell what about. She continues to explain herself.
"It was taking advantage, you live in my house, you're depending on me right now. Would you have even been able to say no if you didn't want to?"
"Yeah?"
"It's coercive."
"Ulysses, you're a very nice girl. I know you wouldn't have kicked me out for not having sex with you, you're obviously not like that."
"You don't know that."
"Yes I do."
Ulysses doesn't know what to say, she fiddles with her hands, still unable to look at the boy.
"It's still not fair, you didn't even get to finish." She mumbles.
"I don't care about that, I don't really get much from it anyway." It reaches its arm out to touch the side of her face. "Ulysses, I really liked it. I promise." She's the one blushing now.
The girl looks sullen, she doesn't really understand what it meant. She feels like she very clearly got more out of last night, she got so lost in the feelings that she didn't give Sig the same attention that it gave her. How can it not mind? Maybe it just doesn't want that from her? Maybe she doesn't have what it wants? It wouldn't be the first time she'd had the wrong body for someone else. She's about to protest again but Sig speaks first.
"You don't owe me anything, please don't do anything because you feel like you have to."
"It's not that I have to, I want -" Ulysses feels a jolt of guilt, obviously she wants to, that's the problem. She pauses. "You made me feel very happy last night, I'm sad that I couldn't do the same for you."
"You could do it though, if you wanted to."
"Of course I want to," she grips the side of her arm, she can feel Sig's hum hanging in the air; it's loud but she cannot make out what it wants. She wonders how much hers is giving away. "You - you're uh, I'm very attracted to you."
Sig's voice takes on a slightly giddy tone.
"I know."
Ulysses loosens the grip on her arm and gingerly looks over at the boy, her eyes meeting with its. In a slow gentle movement, it leans up off the bed and brings its hands up to cradle the sides of her face. There is a strange contrast between the soft flesh of its right hand and the cold plating of its left, but both have a tender hold on her. She feels the urge to look away again but she can't seem to manage. Not knowing what else to do, she brings her hands up to hold Sig, but before she can reach it gently grasps her wrists and brings her hands upwards towards its head, then pressing her palms onto its stubby horns.
Almost instantly, the vague hum becomes clear, as if she'd just taken her head out of the water. She feels the boys anxiety, unsure if it's enough for her, if she really does want it or if she just feels bad for it. Below the anxiety is something stronger though, a painful yearning grasping out, desperate not to let go. It is a yearning for Ulysses, for both her self and for her body. And then she feels something else, arousal. It pours out of her and the boy, unclear where one starts and the other ends.
Ulysses wastes no time pressing herself into Sig, kissing it deeply. The tangle of their hums growing stronger as their lips and tounges slide against each other, becoming an overwhelming noise. She's more aggressive than last time, gripping its sides and squeezing its breasts, then cradling its head as she runs kisses down its neck. She could not care less about her own pleasure, this is for Sig, every drop of attention should go to making it feel as good as she did before.
She lifts the boys shirt off and nips at its breast, adorable moans spill out of its mouth with each kiss. Lingering there for a moment, she probes her tounge across the swollen nub, making Sig quiver and buck its hips as she does so. She moves to the other side, now holding the boys side on one hand, and locking each others fingers with the other. It squirms and pants delicate little breaths between barely controlled groans.
As she continues to work the boy up, Ulysses moves her hand down its side and over its thigh, teasing over the soft inside before landing between its legs. Already a puddle of arousal has formed so thick she can feel it through its underwear. Her mouth still on its breast, she begins to caress its soft bulge in gentle squeezing rubs. She takes her mouth away from its chest and watches its expression, writhing in desperation from the teasing. Mercifully, she peels its underwear away, leaving a trail of clear sticky arousal across its legs.
The girl reaches down and slips her hand around the tender, sticky bulge. Just like last time it is entirely soft, hardly any bigger than the sack beneath it. She tries to move her hand the way she would enjoy, but the movement is awkward and she can't seem to grip it right. The moans and panting have dried up, and she feels very insecure in this moment.
"Sig, could you, uh," she feel humiliated to have to ask, "could you show me what feels good for you?"
"Yeah!" It sounds very enthusiastic, which relieves the tension a little.
Sig takes its right hand and places it over its crotch. One finger rests on the small shaft while the others press into the flesh on either side.
"Most of the time I do something like this," it gently rubs up and down, each movement up exposes the head a little as the skin glides over it, "just, slowly and softly."
The girl is mesmerised for a moment, watching its eyes roll back a little as it pleasures itself. Sig stops and guestures for Ulysses to try, and she reaches her hand back over its crotch. The position isn't quite right from in front of it.
"Can you sit in front of me?"
She asks, and the two quickly reposition themselves. The girl sits with her back against the headboard of the bed, and the boy nestles between her legs, resting the back of its head on her chest. She reaches under its arm and between its legs again. It's a lot easier from here. Sig's hips thrust hopelessly into her hand as she continues her rubbing, coating her hand in glistening slick. She moves her idle hand up the boys chest and begins playing with its breast again, the thursting does not let up. The moans get louder and she forces her head over to its neck, kissing and biting.
"That's not fair!" Sig cries out as it twitches in her grasp. She can't be sure but it seems to have swollen a little between her fingers. It's probably the biggest it's going to get.

"When did you figure it out?"
"About 19. I mean I'd known for years at that point, but I didn't really put all the pieces together until 19." Ulysses looks at her feet. "I'm guessing you were younger?"
"13, I knew this girl who looked a lot like me. I used to be so scared of turning into a man," Sig gives a nervous laugh before continuing, "I think uh, I hadn't actually considered that I could be like this until I met her."
"It must have been nice getting onto the medication so young."
"Eh, it took a couple of years." Sig runs its hand along the inside of its leg, "I don't know, I guess I was still luckier than most."
"Maybe. It would have been nice knowing another girl like me when I was younger, I had to learn about all this from the web. It took so long to get the dose right, and by that time I'd already had so much hair grow in, and my voice is horrible, and my body had stopped growing years ago."
Sig leans over onto Ulysses' side, resting its head on her shoulder.
"I wish I could have met you when you were younger."
Ulysses reaches her hand over to cradle Sig's head, gently rubbing its cheek with her thumb.
"I think you would have found me very insufferable."
"Why? But you're so sweet?"
"I was not very receptive to other people back then."
"Except for Ingram?"
"Except for Ingram. I don't know, he just got me. He'd like - " she stops to think for a second, "I would push him away and he wouldn't get all clingy, he'd actually leave me alone, but he wouldn't get mad at me either. I don't know, I think I was very complicated back then and he was the only person who had the patience to figure me out."
???
"Why did he drop you? I know I'm biased but it seems like you two really liked each other, you still get along so well."
"I'm just not his type. I was when we met, but then I changed. He tried really hard to keep liking me, but he couldn't, and he's a bad liar. It had to end."
"By changed you mean, your body?"
Ulysses exhales, "I was so mad at him, it was the happiest I'd ever been and he just liked me less and less the more time passed." She smiles a bit sadly, "Looking back though he really did try, found me lots of clothes, kept saying what a pretty girl I was becoming. It just hurt a lot, it felt like the happier I was the less he could bear to touch me."
"It sounds like he did the right thing."
"Probably. I guess nobody can control what they like and what they don't like. Better that he didn't drag it out."
???
"Ulysses?"
"Yeah?"
"I'm glad that you're a girl now."